Hey sister, yes, you the one with the beautiful smile that lights up the room. It’s ok not to be picky. It’s ok to give the nice Christian guy a chance.
Yes, you can go on a date with someone you’re not attracted to. Yes, hears me out before you click on the back button because the above sentences may have offended you.
When we look around today at the array of movies and talk shows, what do we see? It is sad; that Christian women seem to gravitate to men that are gorgeous, rich, or not the slightest bit interested in them.
Not to mention men that are not Christians.
Ladies, I want you to know that it is ok to date the nice Christian guy that shows a promising future in Christ even though he is shorter. It’s ok to date someone that doesn’t give you butterflies whenever you see them.
Does the Bible have anything to say about dating a nice Christian guy?
You’re probably thinking to yourself, the bible doesn’t speak on this, so where is this reasoning coming from? However, the bible says the following:
But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” (1 Sam.16:7)
Samuel made the mistake of going ahead of God. He wanted to anoint the one who was the most handsome. God and God alone can see our hearts. He knows what’s best for us. Beauty is vain and fleeting; let’s not get caught up in the physical or material possessions of man.
Jesus could have come to earth and made himself into the most handsome man that would have ever lived, yet he didn’t. He could’ve established himself as King and possessed all of the earth’s wealth (even though he owns everything), yet he didn’t.
However, Jesus came with unpretentiousness and humbled himself unto God, knowing that his task wouldn’t be a glamorous one. There was only the power that he possessed that made people follow him.
He is the Savior of the world, the King of all Kings, and the Creator of us all.
Jesus wants everyone who follows him to have a heart change. After all, he looks on the inside.
What exactly are you looking for in your future mate?
Many women today don’t look for the substance in a man attracted to them or actively pursuing them. We let frivolous things cloud our judgment and sometimes take bad advice from Christian friends that aren’t any good.
We look at the outward appearance often and make up our minds that he isn’t the person for us.
Don’t worry; I’m not only knocking on women because men do it too. I know some men appreciate the sister that is great at children’s church or great at singing. But if she is chubby or not shaped the way they would like, she is overlooked or placed and kept in the friend zone while they pursue the “gorgeous looking girls.”
Nothing is wrong with finding your type and pursuing that individual but let’s get in the habit of looking at the inner person and not allow the outward appearance to determine who we pursue.
Look at Esther.
One book in the bible that comes to mind is Esther. Esther was literally taken by soldiers appointed by the king to grab the prettiest ladies of the land. None of these ladies had probably ever seen the king up close, but I’m sure some were ecstatic at the thought that they had a chance to become Queen.
However, I’m certain that some who, like Esther, probably just wanted to go home. It wasn’t until Mordecai spoke to Esther that she realized that this could’ve been the plan of God for her life.
This awesome opportunity to become Queen was given to her.
Esther nor the other ladies cared whether King Xerxes was gorgeous or not. They did what they had to do to prepare for their individual date with him.
Surely, when Esther walked into the room and supposedly saw that the King was shorter than her or fat, she treated him with dignity and respect as she was accustomed to. She probably gave him the attention that he deserved, was reserved yet bold and willing to enjoy her date with him.
It was not only her beauty that drew him to her but her virtuous, quiet, and sweet, respectful spirit.
What am I getting at, you may ask?
Sometimes there may be a brother in the church who is gentlemanly, respectful and has firm faith in God. A brother that is constantly pursuing you. He has shown you how interested he is in you, but you won’t give him the time of day.
Maybe he doesn’t have a car, house, money, or he is a young Christian.
As long as this brother is truly pursuing you individually, it’s ok to give him a chance and see where it goes.
All of us, at some point in time, had someone that as we got closer to them, the more we realized just how attractive the person was. You may not like their appearance on the outside but look at their actions, words, and how they behave or react to certain situations.
Many times, a woman can lose out on a good man by being picky.
When that guy has pursued you for months or years, and his patience runs out, don’t get jealous when your best friend takes to his affections and accept his pursuit.
I can literally hear your screams of, “Well, what if you’re settling for less?”
Look at it this way:
As women, we respond to the love that is shown to us. The bible tells us that husbands should love their wives, and the wife should respect her husband.
This shows me that God knew that men would have problems if he marries a woman he doesn’t love. And women would have problems with their man if she can’t respect him.
Girl, can you imagine having a man constantly pursue you? One who shares your faith, convictions and wants to wait until marriage to be intimate with you? Who doesn’t want a man to love them wholeheartedly? Why don’t you accept that date, invite? He may surprise you.
Have you declined a date from a nice Christian guy lately? What were the distinguishing characteristics that made you reject him? Was it really worth it if you can see him being an amazing leader, husband, and father in the future?
When you reject someone for something that they have no control over its seems to mean. If you applied for a job and didn’t get it just because the interviewer thought you were fat…. do you get my point. You don’t know how amazing this guy could be if you don’t get to know him before rejecting him.
What do you think about giving a nice Christian guy a chance?
Do you think you would try it? Or do you think it’s settling?
Let me know in the comments below.
I love you with the love of Christ,
Keneesha 🙂
Related Post:
How to love your husband Part 1.
Why you should dress modestly.
