I don’t know how many times I’ve seen this done, but every time it happens, I’m in awe. I’d be walking down the street or driving in my car, and I’ll see two guys pass each other and nod. They don’t know each other from Adam; they’ve never met, but their eyes would lock, and there would be a little nod of acknowledgment. I don’t know what it represents, but I wonder when will women will start supporting women.

I’ve stood in lines where women behind me took turns belittling the threads out of another sister’s choice of clothing.

Sometimes, I’ve had women make remarks about me, some knowing I heard them and others simply not caring if I did.

It would be remiss of me not to mention that I’ve done it many times as well. I’ve seen someone and thought to myself, oh no, why did she choose to wear that? It doesn’t flatter her.. that color doesn’t go with her complexion, etc.…

Every time I do it, I rationalize that what I’m doing is actually trying to help her and not belittle or bring her down, but it’s not true because I would have gone up to her and given her my words of advice if that were the case.

 

We need to start supporting each other.

 

Women weren’t given the right to do many things in yesteryears. However, all of that is changing, and that’s great.  But I fear that our resentment toward each other is still there.

Sometimes I wonder if it’s because there are so many women, but that’s not true because there is room for everyone to excel, grow and shine. DO you know why? Because no one else can be you. Every woman is different. We all have the potential to leave our own unique imprint on this world and stand out to God in our own way.

I don’t know about you, but I tend to feel smothered by women’s successes all around.  And I sometimes feel like I’m drowning right in the midst of everyone. I also know what it’s like to feel overlooked because other women are smarter or prettier than you are.

But one thing I always remember is that I matter to Jesus, and you do too. God never lets us go unseen.

There is a song by Francesca Battistelli that I love. Here is a quote and take a listen. I promise you will leave glowing.

Spent today in a conversation

In the mirror face to face with

somebody less than perfect

I wouldn’t choose me first if

I was looking for a champion

In fact, I’d understand if

You picked everyone before me

But that’s just not my story

True to who You are

You saw my heart

and made

Something out of nothing

[Chorus:]

I don’t need my name in lights

I’m famous in my Father’s eyes

Make no mistake

He knows my name

I’m not living for applause

I’m already so adored

It’s all His stage

He knows my name oh, oh,

He knows my name oh, oh

 

Too often, we are:

 

• Quick to judge other women that we don’t even know
• Belittle women because of their status in life
• Compare ourselves with someone else and complain about their successes while we struggle.
• Get jealous and envious because another woman got blessed with something that we wanted.
• Try to feel better about yourself by making someone else feel bad.
• Telling men about women secrets or struggles

Let’s change that narrative. God has called us to love each other, and this includes women.

In the Bible, we have examples of how close and supportive women can be to each other. Look at the story behind Naomi and Ruth and Mary and Elizabeth.

They weren’t jealous of each other and supported each other no matter what happened.

Don’t be like Leah or Penninah. Instead of being nice and gaining a friend or sister, they chose to be jealous, and their lives were miserable.

So, here is what we can do:

 

Treat others how you want to be treated.

The golden rule will always be with us because it is basic manners. If you don’t want others to talk about you or treat you less than or differently, please don’t do it to someone else. Showing love to other women, even if they were blessed with what you wanted the most, is the easiest way to getting exactly what you want.

 

Be the mature woman

 

Maturity comes with a price. You may not want to forgive first or stretch your hand out. But that is how change can begin. Be mature. It doesn’t matter if you compliment her even when she never compliments you. Kindness is contagious. You have to be the bigger person at times.

Encourage other women

It’s okay to cheer on someone coming right behind you or is even ahead of you. Do you ever have sad days? Only me? Well, encouragement is always needed. Some women like to wear a mask, and they hide their emotions, how they feel, or what they are going through. I once did a twist out that turned out really bad, and I had to wear my hair in some twisted updo that I didn’t like to see. As I was walking toward my work building, a lady passed me on the outside and said, “I love your hairstyle; it’s adorable.” It made my day, and I was no longer self-conscious about my hairstyle. It took little effort for her to say that, and I’m sure she felt just as great as I did, even if she got nothing back.

 

Until you’ve walked in their shoes, don’t judge.

 

Why did you decide to buy that brand? Why are you dating a married man? If you don’t know the individual and haven’t lived their life, please don’t judge them. I am an optimistic person; I always want to see, and I look for the best in others. Men can lie; you don’t know if she doesn’t know or just found out that he is married, always offer the benefit of the doubt. On the other hand, if you know that your girl went after a married man, then that’s where my next point comes in.

 

Be honest

 

Ladies, please don’t talk about another woman behind her back. As women, we already have so much on our plates. Most of us don’t have the strength needed to be destroyed verbally by someone who should understand our own kind.

If her tag is showing, put it in or tell her. Is she dragging toilet paper behind her, let her know or step on it. Did her dress or shirt get tucked into her tights? Please, let her know? If you think that the color she chose to wear is not becoming either, you tell her (be nice about it) or leave her alone.

It’s time for us to start supporting each other.

 

There was a dispute between Euodia and Syntyche in the church of Philippi. Their conflict was so great that it resulted in Paul addressing it in a letter. This conflict was most likely known within the church and could cause division. Paul entreated both ladies to resolve the conflict and agree. (Philippians.4:1-3)

Ladies, we have common ground because we are believers in Christ as sisters in the Lord; let us love each other with fervent love. We can’t forgive anything because there is nothing that God won’t forgive us if we ask. So, when will women start supporting women? I say right now.

What are your thoughts? Share this post with someone you know it will help and PIN it so you can save it.